


J+H: Refollowing their Story

by anminge



Category: That '70s Show
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:48:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24929455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anminge/pseuds/anminge
Summary: My attempt at trying to clean up, clarify, deepen, and reinvestigate Hyde and Jackie's relationship in That 70s Show. I want to show the moments in between the large ones, and maybe even large moments that the show wasn't able to explore. Right now the chapters follow the major moments in their relationship, one at a time.
Relationships: Jackie Burkhart/Steven Hyde
Comments: 12
Kudos: 66





	1. After Their First Date

Hyde watched Jackie Burkhart wave goodbye as she entered her oddly un-lit house. He waited for her bedroom light to turn on, to make sure she got home alright, before heading towards the Foreman's.

She offered to drop him off, but he wanted to walk. He needed to clear his head. The only thing his mind seemed capable of at the moment was replaying their kiss over and over again.

 _"_ I didn't feel anything" she had said. She put him in a corner, all he could do was agree. He's not gonna let Jackie Burkhart walk around gloating that she got the stoner burnout to feel things with her self proclaimed magic lips. But... nothing??? She had to to be lying.

Hyde knew it was for the best. Regardless of her fibbing, she has her reasons. And those exact reasons are why they would never have worked out. It's not like he wanted it to work out either. He didn't regret their date. Now hopefully she'll leave him alone and he can continue to... continue to... continue to do what Hyde does best. And that did not include dating a preppy cheerleader.

This feeling of rejection, that he's not enough, he's numb to it. What's the difference now that it's Jackie? Hyde can get with women who have substance, depth, and actually know that Led Zeppelin is a band. Or he can stay single. He's a free man. He has no attachments. No material possessions. No emotional possessions.

Hyde got over Donna's rejection real fast. He's never even been depressed after a breakup before, he just moved on. So why can't he stop playing that kiss over and over in his head?

"Well, did you feel something?"

_Damnit._

Jackie turned on her bedroom light and walked towards the window to see Steven Hyde begin to walk away from her house. She let out a sigh and slumped to the floor, grabbing the closest stuffed animal to hold.

Nothing. She felt nothing. She just had to keep telling herself that until it was true.

Her kiss with Steven was electric. The whole day seemed unreal with him punching Chip, and taking her on a date. He really was her knight in shining armor. But when Jackie pulled away from Steven, she saw herself in his Aviator sunglasses. She saw what he saw: a loud mouthed, bratty stuck up rich cheerleader who's only ever dated Michael Kelso. And she knew he would never love her as she was, that he would never give her the time of day.

Inviting Chip to the Veteran's Day BBQ was an attempt to move on. And their date was a miracle, a dream. But she realized, Steven was right. They would never last. She saw how caring, thoughtful, and sensitive he was. She saw the lonely kid who needed a family, and love. But she knew he only ever saw her as Michael's bratty ex-girlfriend who likes unicorns and fluffy things.

And... he would have a point.

Jackie got up, and went into her bathroom to take off her make up. As she looked in the mirror, and ran her makeup remover down her face, she began to see herself more clearly. And she realized.... she didn't know who she was. She knew she liked money, and hated foreigners, and loved herself. She knew she was beautiful and fashionable. But also, she's 16 now. In a few years she'll graduate high school... and then where will she be?

Jackie imagined herself in five years: stunning, of course, but also, mature. She held herself high, she had her arms interlocked with Steven who was in a suit and tie and- no, stop. She can't keep fantasizing about Steven, that's how she got here in the first place.

She opened her journal, and she made a declaration for herself. Jackie Burkhart is now on the path to discovering the mature Jackie, the Jackie that has it all, that's older and wiser, and somehow, yes somehow, even more stunningly beautiful than the present day Jackie. No more boys like Michael who cheat on her and gaslight her. And no more boys like Steven who don't care to see who she really is, even when she tries to show herself.

Jackie Burkhart is reborn.


	2. Jackie is Back with Kelso

Jackie looked up from her Vogue magazine and realized everyone was gone. Well, everyone except Hyde. She had expected Donna to let her know when she was leaving. Or Michael to at least take her with him. Was she so absorbed in her magazine that she didn't realize they left?

"They're just getting food."

Jackie turned to Steven, whose gaze never left the TV.

"Oh, yeah, I know."

The silence now felt awkward. Jackie usually fills silences with talking, talking about anything. It really was her specialty. But she wasn't trying to push things with Steven. Plus, she Matured. She turned back to her Vogue.

"So you're back with Kelso now." Jackie thought maybe she had imagined it but she could have sworn Steven just spoke to her. You don't care, remember dipshit?

"Oh uh, yeah."

Steven's foot swayed side to side while resting on the table. Could that be... an emotion? Jackie is invested in her relationship with Michael, but she's more invested in herself. And she thought, what the hell, she and Steven are never going to happen so what difference does it make.

"It's a more mature relationship than before. I'm a more mature person. I think we've really grown since our last break up."

Hyde scoffs. What does he know, Jackie thought. Fuck off, Steven. She returns to her vogue. All of a sudden she feels eyes on her, and she looks around. Steven had taken his feet off the table, and turned towards her. Wow, that's a lot of energy he's exerting in her direction.

"Jackie, I can't speak to whether or not you yourself have become mature, but Kelso is the biggest, dumbest least mature moron to be born in the United States. Maybe even the world. And I'll say this to you again, one last time, you can do so much better than Kelso."

And with that, he put his hands on his knees, and got up. He began to walk towards his bedroom, out of sight.

"But not good enough for you."

Jackie had mumbled it. A mumble. Maybe Jackie doesn't have a lot of practice mumbling as she always loud and everyone should hear what she has to say. But this time, she really didn't want Steven to hear her. Even if it was true.

"What?"

Just as Hyde turned around to address the loudest mumble he had ever heard in his life, Donna, Eric, Kelso, and Fez come bumbling down the stairs practically screaming. Fez's and Kelso's hands got stuck in the candy bowl again and as much fun as that is for Hyde to laugh as his dimwitted friend's buffoonery, he saw Jackie rush up to take care of Michael Kelso. She patted his hair and told him everything would be okay, while she scolded Donna for letting it happen.

Mature my ass, he thought. He didn't want to watch this. And he didn't need to look at someone playing games with him.

He went back into his room to put on some Floyd and brood, you know, the usual.

First she says she feels nothing, and now she says I don't think she's good enough for me?

Okay enough. He had to get this small little brunette loud mouth brat out of his mind. He was going crazy. And now she's back with Kelso? The guy who burned down her house? Cheated on her with dozens of girls? Lied to her constantly? It struck Hyde that maybe she didn't know, or realize the full extent of Kelso's lies. It didn't matter. He tried. Now it's only their own free will causing their suffering. He had nothing to do with it.


	3. Jackie Gets Her Promise Ring

Hyde stared at the abomination of disgusting romance he saw before him. He didn't know what was worse, Kelso giving Jackie a promise ring after proclaiming he still wants to talk with her after "doing it", or the fact that he actually wishes he could return to 10 minutes ago when Fez was listing how many times he's seen boobs in real life.

Jackie jumps in Kelso's arms, happy to finally have the life long prison sentence she asked for. Or at least a promise for the sentencing. God, she mad him sick. Even her happiness over something so material, so contrived, so benign infuriated him. And with Kelso? They're both idiots.

He wanted to continue drowning his bleak existence in pinball and forget the whole ordeal. Let them ruin their lives on their own.

Hyde had only ever seen one happy married couple in his life and that was the Foremans. And even then their lives seemed miserable. Tied down in a suburban wasteland, two screw up kids, and hell, even a burnout orphan boy they feed every day. Marriage is a last resort. Not a romantic next step. And certainly not for 17 year olds.

"Are you distracted, big guy? You're letting the balls go right through the hole! Let me show you how to do it"

Hyde let Fez push him aside and play on his quarter. Damn, he really must be distracted. He looked over and saw Jackie holding Kelso's hand and stroking his hair. He felt disgusted all over again.

"Hey Fez, what's with people's obsession with marriage anyway?"

"In my country, we don't have marriage. The dirty Christians haven't gotten to us yet."

"Rock on, man."

"Hey I got one!" Fez turned to Hyde, awaiting his high-five that never came. "

Hyde didn't like where his mind had wandered. He didn't like that his mind was wandering at all. He should be able to have complete control over where and when and why his mind supposedly wanders and under no circumstances should any of that be about Jackie Burkhart.

Why does his mind keep wandering and thinking about Jackie Burkhart??? 

"Uh Hello, Hyde? High-five please! I just got a hole in one."

Hyde came back to Earth momentarily. "Oh nice one, man. Come on, let's get out of here." 

"But I'm playing so well!" 

"Out!" 

Fez slouched his shoulders and left the Hub reluctantly, shortly followed by Hyde, shocked at this own relief.

Jackie admired her new promise ring on her finger. Finally! She had everything she wanted: maturity. And from Michael Kelso! Jackie counted all of it as a win-win.

"You're so pretty when you look at your ring."

Jackie looked back at her Knight. He was hot. He was cute. He knew Jackie so well. Plus, they've been together for years and have a history. Jackie always imagined this moment filled with happy tears and lots of applause. So why does it feel... off?

It was like pulling teeth to get Michael to get her this ring. Jackie Burkhart always gets what she wants though, so that wasn't a problem. Just like her daddy taught her. Well, not everything apparently... "

"You okay, pudding?"

Oh crap. Her mind had drifted off to Steven again.

"Everything's fine, baby." She kissed Michael. Making out usually distracts him. Now she'll have to put out in the back of his van but whatever. She'll just let him do it and get it over with.

Huh.

That felt...

"Jackie? You're doing it again."

"What?"

"Your eyes kinda get all glazed over and your eyebrows go sad and you stop looking at my perfectly chiseled face."

"I'm just tired, that's all, baby."

"Oh okay. Because for a second there it almost looked like you were thinking and I got worried."

"Oh honey, you know I'm too beautiful to need to think."

"I know! That's why I was worried!"

Jackie smiled and laughed and kissed her groom-to be- to be. She was happy with Michael. This made her happy. She and he will get married, move out, be rich, live happily ever after, and Steven Hyde will be just a little friend who Kelso feeds every once in a while.

She had nothing to worry about.


	4. Kelso in California

_Jackie, I think we both know what Kelso is doing in California right now._

If Jackie was being honest with herself, she wasn't surprised. What did surprise her was why she kept coming to the Foreman's basement. She was popular. She had friends that weren't these dweebs. But she was too embarrassed to hang out with anyone on the cheerleading squad. Everyone would know Kelso was cheating on her again, and she didn't know how to handle that. She's not used to making mistakes.

Jackie peered over the couch to look at Steven. She wasn't sure if he had dozed off or not. She still didn't know why he wore sunglasses inside.

_He's not gonna marry you, doll. It's Kelso._

She had dated him for years. Did she really not know who Michael was?

Her Cosmo last week talked about expectations, and the Imagined Boyfriend. Had she been delusional about Michael this whole time? Maybe he really did have no potential and they would never be together. Jackie hated thinking about it. She just wanted someone to call her pretty so she would know she's perfect again.

_God this is hot._

Jackie's face burned red a little as she remembered what happened a few days ago. Steven never spoke. He barely spoke to her at all. These make out sessions happened out of pure boredom and loneliness but he had let that slip out. Jackie wasn't stupid. She knew what was going on. But hey, she needed it too. It was just for now until Michael and Donna get back, and then it's over. Just for the summer.

Jackie look over at Steve again. She had worn a different perfume and her favorite lip gloss today. She felt absolutely foolish putting it on to head to the Foreman's basement, but now she felt like a complete clown with Steven half asleep, not paying her any mind at all. When did Jackie Burkhart's life get so pathetic?

_God she smelled good._

Hyde kept his head rested on his arm, playing aloof. Was she really wearing a new perfume right now? And how the hell did he know it was new?

She was basically throwing herself at him. Hyde knew he should care that she was Kelso's girl. And he knew he should care that it was a little pathetic. And he knew he should be disgusted and quit while he's ahead. But he couldn't do it. The old Hyde didn't care about hook ups. He was in, he was out, it was over and done with. So what difference does this one make?

_Just say something and I'll stop hanging out here_.

She had given him an out at the beginning of the summer and he didn't take it. His curiosity got the best of him. As much as he wants to say it's because he believes in justice, and Kelso really had treated her like crap, he knew he had an ulterior motive, even if he hated it. She was crying, man! What else could he do? Plus, he had to admit it was a little nice to shake things up and watch horrible television with someone else in the room sometimes. Hell, she even got pretty good at hitting it.

_What if I never get married?_

Hyde didn't have an answer to that one. In fact, he would often repeat that message in his head as a reminder of where to stop. He can fool around with Jackie. He can let her cry about Kelso. But he is not getting involved with a chick who only sees life as goal posts to a wedding. Nuh uh. Not for this guy.

He pried open an eye to look at her before returning to his aloof sleepy state. She looked good. Hell, who was he kidding. She looked great. And she smelled great.

Hyde would admit only to himself that he enjoyed having her here. Despite the whole, pretending to be asleep thing. The episode of the _Price is Right_ must have finished because he felt Jackie move on the couch, about to get up.

He reached out and grabbed her hand before she could leave. Jackie almost froze. For a small moment he brushed his finger over her knuckles, him still with his eyes closed. She took his hand, and together she leaned into him, kicked her feet up onto the couch, as he took her in his arms.

She laid on top of him, his left arm wrapped around her, her hand linked with his. She heard his heart beat and followed his breaths. It was nice to be held, she thought. For someone to make her feel safe. Even if she knew it was just for the messing around later.

Hyde didn't want her to leave. He knew he should be more careful. But she's a big girl, she knows there's no future with him. Kelso will come back, and hell, maybe they'll even get back together. It didn't matter to Hyde. He held her right now, and it just felt right. Why keep torturing himself with questions.

He felt her kiss his chest, and then his neck. She went to his ear before propping herself up to kiss his face. She leaned in but he stopped her.

What the hell are we doing, he thought.

What the hell is he doing, she thought. Her whole little body was practically on top of him, his arms now wrapped around her waist, holding her butt. All the signs were there to continue. She starred at him looking for an answer. Why did he stop? Was she not pretty enough anymore? Had he finally grown bored? Oh, don't tell me he finally got some morals or hell, even wants to talk, she thought.

He watched as she tilled her head and raised her eyebrows, her hands resting on his chest.

"Steven, is everything all right?"

He guessed she hadn't noticed. If she didn't see it, then it was fine by Hyde.

"Everything's peachy, doll."

She shrugged it off and leaned in for the kiss. Hyde held her as she pushed herself into him, his legs now on the couch, wrapped around hers.

He was going to consider it a sign, and a good one at that, that she didn't notice this time didn't start as a hook up, or a hot make out session. It kinda almost sorta a little maybe not but kinda almost felt real.

Almost.


	5. Eric and Donna Find Out

Who the hell does Foreman think he is anyway? Telling Hyde what to do and who not to do.

Hyde allowed himself to briefly remember the summer days where it was just him and Jackie: no pressure, no commitment, and no Foreman. Just her. He could barely even believe how well their little arrangement was working out. Of course an idiot like Foreman would never understand.

Hyde briefly took his eyes off the rode to look over at Jackie. Just a month ago their little rendezvouses and hot make out sessions were uncomplicated. Why do things always have to get so stupidly complicated?

Jackie was angry. How could Donna not support her? Donna and Jackie were suppose to be friends. Sure, they don't have everything in common but still. Jackie remembered how Donna knew about Michael's cheating and hadn't told her. She figured they just weren't good enough friends back then. But now?

She didn't expect Eric and Donna to understand her relationship with Steven. But it's not like she can separate her life with Steven from Eric and Donna.

"I knew they wouldn't understand. This is why I told you it had to be a secret."

"Don't blame me for them finding out, Steven. They would have found out eventually."

Hyde knew Jackie was right, on both accounts. That didn't make him happy about it though.

Hyde pulled over onto the side of the road. They were in a wooded area leading up to a park with walking trails. A prime teenage hookup spot. Hyde didn't intend to stop here but he needed to defog his brain.

This was the part he hated about relationships. He just wants to have fun, mess around a little. Why does this stuff always come back to bite him in the ass? Why can't he and Jackie just fool around and no one make a scene about it? The worst part is that Hyde knew this was wishful thinking. Everyday he's surprised Jackie hasn't woken up and remembered she hated him. And everyday he wakes up and forgets to hate her as well.

"Steven, what's wrong? You're brooding again."

Hyde hadn't realized how it must have looked for him to pull over and then deliberately remain silent.

"Sorry, I'm just thinking."

"Steven, I've been thinking too and..."

"Wait, Jackie Burkhart's been thinking?"

"Why yes I have! And I'm really starting to enjoy it now, actually."

"The little headaches's gone away?"

"Stop it". Jackie lightly slaps Hyde on the shoulder.

Holy shit are they playing around?

_You really do care for her, don't you?_

Hyde looked over at Jackie Burkhart, the rich snobby brat who's suppose to sicken him but doesn't. When did any of this start?

"Steven, as much as I think Eric and Donna are hypocritical assholes who need to butt out of our business... I think we need to tell Michael."

"What like together?"

"Oh god no. You have to tell him."

"Why do I have to tell him?"

"You're the best friend. I'm just the ex-girlfriend. You're the one 'breaking code' or whatever."

"You're friends with him."

"Barely."

"That whole thing's stupid anyway. It's not like Kelso owns you or anything. You're not Kelso's leftovers. We shouldn't have to 'come out' to Kelso that we're hooking up."

"Okay but Steven... Eric and Donna know and eventually he's going to find out. Are we just suppose to keep it a secret forever? We're obviously not very good at that."

"Eric and Donna don't have the guts to tell him."

"Don't forget Fez."

"There's also Fez..."

"Steven, we have to tell him."

"Yeah, I know."

Hyde absentmindedly took Jackie's hand and started stroking her knuckles. He stared off the driver's side window, lost in his brain, begrudgingly thinking about how to tell Kelso and what there was even to tell.

Jackie watched as Steven took her hand, almost including her in his contemplation. Had he even noticed?

Jackie knew what she wanted long term, of course. There was no question she would get married, have a family, be rich, live happily ever after, as per her usual desires. But right then, in that moment, being 16, sitting in a boy's car as he strokes her hand, what was she looking for? The gesture, although soothing, caused her to feel anxious and overcome. Wasn't this just a meaningless fling? A rebound even? Didn't Steven hate romantic displays of affection or really any and all affection?

They sat in the car, the silence becoming a little awkward. Wait, was something going unsaid? Hyde began to question Jackie's silence. She's never quiet. If she was about to ask for commitment Hyde was ready to drop her off right then and there. He didn't care if she would have to walk home 10 miles in 4 inch heels. He'd bolt.

"Unless we just stopped."

If Hyde was being honest with himself, he'd seen this coming. He knew one day she would say enough was enough, and end things. But his mind had been so preoccupied on how to break the news to his dimwitted life long friend, he truly was caught off guard. He even let one of his eyebrows move up and down a little, his Zen wasn't prepared. He pulled his hand back, and leaned against the window to face her.

"Steven... I've been thinking and... well, if we break if off now then we don't have to tell Michael. And neither of us really expect us to keep going after the summer and then problem solved."

"Do you want to stop?"

"Well, it's not because Eric and Donna said so."

"Then what?"

Jackie couldn't seem to say what she needed to say fast enough for Hyde.

"Oh I see. Well, glad that's out."

"Steven what are you talking about?"

"You want to get back together with Kelso."

"What? Gross ew no! Steven, how could you even say that?"

"Jackie..."

"Steven, I don't want to date Michael and I don't want to call it off. But if you're not ready to tell Michael then that's fine. We can just quit while we're ahead, and then you're free. Isn't that what you want? To not be tied down?"

Why was everything with this chick so much emotional energy? Hyde wanted to just smoke a bowl, play a record, and chill out. Not, you know, communicate.

"Jackie...I don't...I don't hate you. And I don't hate... hanging out with you. When we started, I figured it would be over once summer ended and Kelso came back and... look, I just didn't know if you were going to go back to him and whatever we were doing would just end. So now that you want to tell him it's like... I guess... what I'm saying is I'm cool telling him, you know, if we'll be doing this for a while longer anyway."

Jackie wanted to burst and scream and cheer and shout in exclamation. But she didn't want to ruin the moment. She needed to teach Steven positive reinforcement and that if he was going to open up to her she wouldn't squeal.

"That's cool," she said.

"That's cool? Don't that's cool me. I taught you 'that's cool'."

"Whatever." Jackie didn't even try to hide her smirk.

"Oh so what, you're Zen now?"

"You know Steven, I think it's really mature of you to tell Michael. Especially because I know I don't want to do it. So thank you."

Jackie gave Hyde's arm a little tap, as she put her seat belt back on, her mood obviously lifted. Hyde let out a sigh. Why did he keep digging himself deeper into this ditch? He put his car in gear, and headed back on the road. Maybe this time he'll have a destination in mind.

"Oh, and just to be clear, you're still not my boyfriend."

"Well thank heavens for that." He stole a quick glance looking back at her. He squeezed her knee affectionately and returned his full attention to the road.

So they're telling Kelso...


	6. Sleeping Over

Hyde pulled into the unlit Burkhart residence.

"Thanks again for picking me up, baby. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Jackie leaned in for a kiss, and as she pulled away, Hyde stopped her.

"Jackie. Come on, man. Talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about."

Hyde peered over his Aviator glasses at his loud mouthed, superficial girlfriend.

"I haven't taught you sarcasm yet so it's not working."

"Steven, everything's fine."

"Jackie, I know no one is home."

"I can take care of myself."

"Jackie."

"Steven."

They were at a stand still. Hyde knew Jackie's mom still wasn't in Point Place, and with her dad in prison, 16 year old Jackie was all alone in an empty house.

Sure, her house was huge, had a cleaner, food, and a roof. But Hyde remembered being 14 and coming home to an empty house, having to cook himself dinner with a can of beans and wonder bread, and going to sleep all alone.

Hyde still didn't understand family. He still didn't understand how you love someone or what you do when you love someone or how to let someone love you. He had been learning from Mrs. Foreman how to accept someone's love. And he had learned from Mr. Foreman how to provide and support ones you love. And now he has Jackie, someone he can't help but care deeply about. And he wasn't going to let her feel alone.

He took her hand and held it. She seemed so incredibly small today.

"Baby..."

"Steven, I can take care of myself. I'm not some fragile little immature brat you have to baby."

"Jackie, you know that's not what I meant."

Jackie had been living on her own very successfully for months, thank you very much. And now Steven acts like she needs to be coddled? She can take care of herself. Besides, it's not like he's rich or popular or her dad.

"I can take care of myself, Steven."

It was like looking in a mirror, only this reflection had make up and jewelry on. Hyde began to smirk.

"Oh, so now you're laughing at me? The idea of me being independent is funny to you?"

"No, no Jackie... hey, look. I want you to be independent. I want you to have your own career and your own life. I just... hey, I need you, man. I miss sleeping next to you. I drop you off and then I have to wait until the next day to see you."

"Steven."

"I'm being serious, Jac. Grab your over night bag. You can sleep with me at the Foreman's."

Jackie Burkhart was not a charity case. However....

"Fine."

Jackie walked out of the car and practically slammed the door. Hyde knew Jackie's emotions were... complicated. But he's only looking out for her. If she's gonna be pissed he's not letting her sleep in that house alone, then fine. She was going to be pissed. He'd sleep on the couch if it meant she wouldn't be alone. He didn't care if she was mad at him or not.

He watched Jackie walk around the hood of the car, stomping in her heels. She gets to the path leading to her front door and she turns around and heads towards the driver's window of the car. Hyde rolls the window down to meet her, ready for the protests.

He immediately notices water building in her eyes.

"Thanks, baby."

She kisses him on the cheek and walks back to her empty house, brushing away tears. Hyde wished he could protect her from the atrocities of the outside world but he knew that was impossible. He's not some magician who can eradicate pain and suffering from her life. Just like how the Foreman's didn't solve his problems with his real parents. But they did give him a warm home, and home cooked meals, and a family. Maybe Hyde can't fix Jackie's issues. And hell, he knows that if he's not one of Jackie's issues now, he will be in the future. One day she'll realize she wants things he can't give her. But until then, he'll do what he can.

When Jackie entered the house she allowed herself exactly 15 seconds to cry about being alone and then 7 seconds to cry about how much she loved Steven, and then it was go time. She was not going to feel sorry for herself much longer than that and she didn't need Steven feeling sorry for her either.

Her plan was to keep acting like everything is normal and fine. Nonchalant. She didn't want to make a big deal out of Steven's gesture because she knows he doesn't like that, no matter how much it meant to her. She already thanked him, and they'll settle back into normal.

She didn't want to turn the lights on. She wanted to feel how dark and uninhabited her house was. As she walked up the stairs, the weight of her world fell on her shoulders. She really was alone. What is a girl suppose to do without her dad? Where was she suppose to go without her mom? And how was she going to graduate without knowing how she'll have money?

It felt like her entire house collapsed on top of her and that she couldn't breathe. She kept trying to stop the tears but she couldn't. She really was a charity case wasn't she? Pretty girls don't cry, she said. Stop it.

She put on a brave face and started throwing clothes in her bag. She'll pick her outfit tomorrow with whatever's in there. She couldn't make a fashion decision right now. When she went in the bathroom to pack her make up, she saw her mascara running. She quickly tried to clear it up. No one is going to see a crack or a slip.

She grabbed her fullest pair of pjs just to get through Steven's head that they weren't going to do it just because she was there.

Jackie closed her bedroom door, officially breaking the record for the fastest she's ever packed.

When she got back to the car, she put her bag in the back seat before returning to the passenger's side. She glanced over at her partner, who it seemed hadn't moved an inch.

"Thanks for waiting for me. I'm ready to go."

Hyde turned his body to face Jackie. He needed to see into her eyes to truly know how she felt, as her words would surely tell a different story.

"Hey, baby, you know you can talk to me about this stuff if you need. I am your boyfriend."

Jackie didn't have the energy to deflect. She grabbed Steven's face with both her hands and kissed him. She wanted him to know she saw him, she appreciated him. And as his arms wrapped around her tiny rib cage, she felt safe. This kiss felt different. Jackie's only intention was to show Steven love, not to sleep with him or to boost her self esteem. She really and truly only wanted to transfer her affection. And Hyde must have gotten the memo.

They break apart, perfectly in sync.

"I know, baby. Thank you."

Hyde put El Camino in gear, and pulled out of the Burkhart's driveway.

Hyde wan't thinking about what his surrogate parent's would do if they found out. He wasn't thinking about what his friends would say if they knew. Usually his mind sees destruction ten steps ahead, which naturally results in someone like Kelso getting hurt, and Hyde enjoying himself. But right then, all he could think about was Jackie. How much she needed him, or how much he thought she did. How much he was realizing he needed her. About how both her parents could just abandon her. How she had to put up such a tough wall of defense. How unbelievably young they were to be dealing with such heavy stuff.

Hyde wouldn't call these feelings comfortable. Revolting, maybe. Disgusting. Or worse, common. Do people constantly feel these feelings of anxiety for people they care about? Was this what having a family is like, he wondered.

Was she family?


	7. Hyde has Potential

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who has read and reacted to this fic so far. You've encouraged me to keep writing. 
> 
> By the way, I've started a tumblr to post my work there if that's a medium you use. 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> https://anminge.tumblr.com/

Hyde glanced at his watch. Unbelievable that time can move so slowly all day, and then suddenly, the day's over. Well, I guess that's what happens when you spend your whole Saturday watching _Little House_ and napping, he thought.

Ms. Foreman usually left food for him in the refrigerator, so he figured he'd just eat later. His appetite had left him, which was abnormal. He's a teenage boy, and can usually eat everything and anything all the time. But now he needs to dip into his stash to feel hungry. Eh, it didn't really matter. He was sure he'd survive it, unfortunately.

It was past 10 o'clock which meant he was late calling Jackie but he knew she'd forgive him. He picked up the phone next to the couch and listened if anyone was on the line. Usually Mr. and Mrs. Foreman were getting ready for bed by then, but Hyde wanted to be careful. He never tried to overstay the Foreman's welcome. Now, had Foreman himself been on the line, Hyde may have taken the opportunity to mine for ammunition for a later burn. But the line was dead.

_I taped my house_ _number to the bottom of the phone so now you have no excuse and can't forget it._

_But what if I remove it?_

_Well good luck removing the fifty others I've taped to everything in your room. You have no excuse, Steven. You better call me!_

Hyde remembered laughing at Kelso for being whipped and having to talk to Jackie almost every night. And Hyde would admit, that when she instituted on this rule for their relationship, he was pissed. No one was going to tell Hyde what to do or where to be or who to call. He wasn't going to be tied down or controlled by some woman, even if said woman was manipulating his mind, body, and spirit in some sort of sorcerous spell like it felt Jackie was.

However, now that school had started again, and Jackie had cheerleading most days and she actually did her homework, he was seeing her less than during the summer. And what with Foreman and Donna back together, Hyde found himself alone in the basement again. He's normally content on his own. Plus, he doesn't have high expectations for himself so it's not like he considers the time wasted. But it's nice to have company sometimes, a truth he would only admit to himself, while alone and without company.

And Hyde isn't some puppy dog with no spine. If he didn't want to talk with Jackie on the phone, he wouldn't. But the truth was, he did.

He wanted to hear her voice and feel the comforting condescending tone when she bitched about the girls on her squad. Hyde realized that he hadn't even left the basement today, and hadn't spoken to anyone besides a "good morning" to Mrs. Foreman. Maybe he had become so deprived of human contact and his bar of social survival was so low that he now actually enjoys catching up with Jackie.

Hyde dialed Jackie's phone number from memory. Hey, it was only seven digits, and he's not a brain dead idiot like Kelso.

Jackie picked up immediately.

"Steven! I missed you today! How was your day? How are you? My day was soooo hectic. We had cheer practice this morning and that slut Janet was there. She had the nerve to say I'll never make it as a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader if I can't get my kicks straighter. Everyone knows she's only on the squad because she sleeping with the football coach...."

Hyde scrunched his shoulders to rest the phone on his neck, while he used his free hands to roll a blunt. He knew this was going to take some time and he wanted to be comfortable.

Jackie had waited all day to speak with her boyfriend. She even had a notebook where she wrote down everything she wanted to talk about. Usually she'd go to her mom about things like needing to buy a new designer purse because some other rich girl just bought one. But she couldn't exactly talk with her mom about that right now... and usually if she wasn't feeling prettier than everyone else, she'd talk to Donna, whose poor taste in clothes always perked Jackie right up. But Donna had been so busy with Eric... And usually if she wanted to gossip about people being sluts, she'd speak with Michael. But then Michael would just cheat on her with whichever slut she was just gossiping about and needless to say, she doesn't call Michael up to chit-chat anymore.

"Jackie, have you ever considered that maybe those bitches on the cheerleading squad are just that, bitches and not worth your time or energy? Let alone my time and energy listening to you rant about them."

"Steven, how could you even say that? Those bitches are my friends!"

"Well, sounds like they're jealous."

"Of course they're jealous, Steven. Everyone's jealous of me! Catch up. I have everything anyone would ever want, remember?"

Oh silly, Hyde. How could he forget?

Jackie had been feeling more isolated from the girls on the squad and the other popular girls in school since her dad went to prison. She didn't seem to have much in common with them anymore. Or maybe she just had more real things to focus on? The only person in her life right now that was a solid rock was Steven. She assumed he hated her gossiping but only put up with it because she puts out. But also, this is what you get when you date Jackie Burkhart and she wasn't going to waver.

"So baby, how was your day?"

"Oh, has her Royal Highness finally granted me the floor to speak?"

"Yes, Steven." Jackie tried her best to convey her eye-roll through her voice.

"You're not gonna believe this but the girls on the cheerleading squad said that _my_ kicks weren't straight enough."

"Steven!"

"Ah, come on, man. That was a good one!" 

"Steven, I could kick you!"

He smirked. He knew he was being a little shit but it was too easy and too much fun. Jackie's skin was tougher than she let on.

"All right all right... uh my day was uh.... fine."

"Just fine, Steven?"

"I don't know. What do you want me to say?"

Despite their relationship starting off relatively silent, Jackie had really grown to love what Steven had to say. Sure, most of it didn't make sense to her yet. But he was far more interesting than Michael ever was and much more talkative when it was only the two of them.

"Well, what about what we talked about yesterday? How exactly is the CIA brainwashing people to buy Beach Boys albums again?"

"Baby, I told you. The CIA uses the radio to convince idiot people with no taste in music what to listen to. They have no perspective! And all of a sudden, last week, the stations started playing more Beach Boys then normal and it's making everyone effeminate and weird. Fez won't stop humming along."

"I like the Beach Boys."

"Jackie, no, you don't. You only think you like the Beach Boys because the media has convinced you they're good music by not playing anything of quality for your brain to compare it to. It's basic manipulation by the Man, man."

Jackie noticed Steven's rise in paranoia lately and had started to worry about him. He wasn't exactly branching out, nor was he leaving the Foreman's basement. He had been so pessimistic about his future when they discussed his SAT scores and any prospects he might have. If she was going to be with him long term, he would need to get some more pep in his step!

"Baby, have you ever thought about being like... a professor! You could write books about this stuff, and we could tour the country, and you could have a big bus with my face on it!"

Here she goes again... trying to give Hyde hopes of a future....

"Jackie, I told you. I'm not going to college."

"Well it's okay if you don't want to go to college, Steven. But what are you going to do when I'm a largely successful Dallas Cowboy's cheerleader by day and fashion magazine editor by night? You're gonna have to keep up with me, Steven."

"Babe, I'll be cheering you on peacefully and contently from our basement, beer in hand, waiting for you to come home so I can get money for my stash."

"I love when you imagine our future together."

"Don't get too attached, Jac. There's still the inevitable day when you wake up and realize you've wasted your life on me and hate me forever."

"Steven, we have to work on your self esteem. You're worse than some of the girls on the squad. And they're ugly! They have good reason to hate themselves. But you, Steven, you have potential!"

"Jackie can we talk about something else..."

"No, Steven. This is serious. I'm really starting to worry about you. Did you even leave the basement today?"

"I don't need you worrying about me, Jackie. I'm fine."

"You know what, Steven? I usually only ever care or worry about myself. And here I go actually caring about you and you act like it doesn't matter. Well it does matter, Steven. You matter! And you should be thanking me for being so selfless."

Hyde chuckled. How typical of his shallow girlfriend to campaign for an award in selflessness upon taking even the slightest interest in him. He couldn't help but find it cute.

"You're right, Jac. What type of monster boyfriend am I to keep taking advantage of your kindness and sacrifices?"

"I've been asking myself the same thing, Steven."

Hyde was always amused when Jackie threw it back at him. He needed someone who could keep up. And after being utterly and entirely alone all day, borderline depressed in actions and thoughts, Hyde found that their phone call had lifted his mood.

It's not that Hyde didn't enjoy being alone. He cherished the peace and quiet he found amongst the general chaos of his friend group. And he loved his single, bachelor lifestyle. But recently he had been feeling so... empty and unfulfilled when he was lonely. Lately he had been...

missing Jackie.

It was crazy how someone so completely opposite of him, someone who just a year ago he couldn't stand, could now be the person whose company he craved. He kept warning himself not to get too attached. He had been honest when he said one day she would leave him. He knew her priorities and he just couldn't meet those expectations.

Well, she's a free woman. It's not like he was forcing their relationship or anything. If she didn't want to be with him, she would have left. Simple as that.

But Hyde really and truly didn't want that. At least not right now. Not yet.

"Steven about your SATs and college, I really think that-"

"It's Saturday. Don't you have homework to do or something?"

Jackie obviously touched a nerve. She only wanted the best for her Steven and she wasn't going to be snapped at for it.

"Well fine, Steven. If that's how you're going to be about it. I'll just talk to you when I see you tomorrow."

"Wait, Jackie, before you leave, uh..."

Hyde realized he may have gone too far. He didn't mean to sound sharp. And he wanted Jackie to know how much he appreciated talking to her, despite, you know, being miserable during the entire conversation. Hyde took a moment to gather his strength. He wasn't trying to be some emotional baby or wimp like Foreman. He was only truly to be honest, and hey, sometimes emotional honesty is scary, especially for Hyde.

"I just wanted to say that uh... I really missed you today, Jackie. And uh, thanks for talking with me."

Jackie took this as a confession, apology, and devotion of love all wrapped into one.

"Oh Steven!"

"Good night!"

Hyde had quickly hung up the phone. He considered that having gone the best anyone could have expected.

Hyde glanced at his watch. It was almost midnight. How was this day still not over?

His appetite had returned and he figured he might as well sustain his life for one more day, if only because she had promised to see him tomorrow.

Yeah, he wanted to see tomorrow, for sure.


	8. Jackie Gets Caught in the Rain

"Are you gonna sleep in the bathroom or what? Come on out."

Jackie slowly emerged from the basement bathroom into Hyde's dingy room.

Jackie had gotten caught in the pouring rain walking to the Foreman's house. She couldn't take her car of course, because the Foreman's would have noticed it. And Hyde didn't pick her up because she figured, hey, it's not that far. I'll just walk! Well, it poured. And she hadn't grabbed her umbrella. Jackie had gotten soaked to the bone, along with her overnight bag and all of her things.

They couldn't risk using the dryer in case it woke up one of the Foreman's. And she wasn't about to get caught trying to wear slutty Lori's clothes. Everything about her staying over had to remain a secret.

And a new addition to that secret was Jackie having to wear Hyde's clothes.

"Don't look! I'm hideous!"

Jackie looked like she would rather be dead then have to wear her boyfriend's Zeppelin t-shirt and grey suit pants. None of which had been washed by the way. Her makeup bag hadn't been preserved either so here she stood, Jackie Burkhart— yes you heard that correctly— Jackie Burkhart, with no makeup on, her hair flat and damp from the rain, mascara residue under her eyes, and wearing used sweatpants and a band t-shirt.

She didn't know who she was gonna kill or fire but she knew someone was going to pay for this.

Hyde stared at his preppy, stuck up, superficial girlfriend all stripped of her usual drag. She has never let him see her without make up or without designer clothes. She would apply what she called her "sleeping make up" when she was over and slept with her hair still done and usually wore her matching pyjama set. So to see her wearing his clothes, and out of her comfort zone, was pretty hot he wasn't gonna lie.

And truth be told, Hyde loved the way Jackie presented herself if only because it's how she wants to present herself. She's comfortable and confident. She always looked good and it didn't matter to him that she didn't give off some biker chick persona. But it certainly was entertaining to see her all cute and frazzled in his own clothes.

He couldn't hide the smirk that grew on his face.

"You're laughing at me. Stop it! I'm ugly and gross and you're not supposed to see me like this."

Jackie remembered the first and only time her ex-boyfriend Michael saw her without make up. Sure, she was also extremely sick. But he was so revolted and scared of her that she swore she would never be without makeup in front of her boyfriend again. Does Steven think she's ugly? Does he hate her now? Is he gonna break up with her? She's gonna get broken up with while wearing bagging clothes!!!

Jackie felt herself getting worked up despite her attempts at suppressing her tears.

"Stop laughing. It's not funny."

"Baby, I'm not laughing at you."

Hyde was on the other side of the room, mostly to admire his girlfriend's new look. But he got up from his chair so she could see just how much he wasn't laughing. He's not about to be in trouble with her over something he didn't do. As he approached her in the doorway, he realized this issue was bigger than he expected.

"Holy shit you're crying."

He took her in his arms and she finally let it out. She remained with her arms crossed, too afraid to expose more of her unshapely attire. Hyde pulled her close and rubbed her back.

"Come on, it's okay."

Hyde wasn't an accomplished comforter, okay? Cut him some slack...

"Tell me what's wrong, baby"

"I'm hideous!!!" Jackie cried out. Hyde was a little worried the Foreman's might hear her so he took to gently shushing her until she stopped crying, or at least until she could talk without wailing. Hyde had dealt with crying Jackie before but this was something else. He genuinely didn't understand where this was coming from.

When her cries had become sniffles and his shirt essentially a tissue, Hyde used his hands to pull Jackie's face up towards him. He whipped her tears away with his thumb and kissed her nose. She smiled.

"Okay baby, what's wrong?"

"You were laughing at me because of how ugly I am."

"Jackie... I wasn't laughing at you. I promise."

"But I'm not wearing make up and my hair is horrible. Worse than Donna's! And I'm not in my nice clothes and—"

Okay, now Hyde was laughing at her.

"See? You're laughing at me!"

"Because, man, you're cracking me up."

"I'm gonna walk home."

Jackie tries to leave but Hyde pulls her hand to bring her back in his arms.

"Jackie, I'm laughing now because... I never get to see you with your defenses down like this. It's like I'm looking at a different Jackie. One who maybe even has a soul."

"Steven, that's not funny. Last time a boyfriend of mine saw me without makeup he screamed and ran and almost broke up with me and here you are laughing because I'm hideous."

"Jac, I'm not that idiot Kelso, okay? I love the way you look when you do your make up but right now, with your hair all droopy, and your big eyes staring up at me with those little black flakes, not to mention your ass in my sweatpants—"

"Steven! You're mocking me!"

"What? Jackie, you look totally hot! You look super cute. I swear. I was only laughing because you seemed so upset over nothing. Babe, you're radiating burnout cuteness."

Jackie looks up at her boyfriend. He wasn't wearing his sunglasses so she could actually see into his eyes. He stared at her, absentmindedly stroking her hair down her back with one hand, while still holding her cheek with the other. He was giving her That Look. It's the same look he gives her when they're lying in bed, just cuddling. Or when she brings him a popsicle. Or when she gets up to change the record. Or when he thinks she's not looking. With just his eyes he takes her in, and she feels seen, like the precious (expensive, glamorous, and high end) jewel that she is.

"Do you really mean it, baby?"

He kissed her ever so softly. He wanted to be delicate with her, suppressing all of his desires to be the opposite of delicate.

"You look incredibly sexy."

Jackie stretched her arms around Hyde's neck and brought his neck in for another kiss. Hyde held her tighter this time, their kiss deeper and stronger.

Hyde didn't want to push anything. He didn't want to mess up Jackie staying at the Foreman's by pressuring her to have sex. He didn't want her to have any excuse to try to stay back at her abandoned house by herself. But damn if he didn't want to take her right then.

Jackie had just gone from feeling the least sexy she had ever felt in her life to wanting to mount her boyfriend right then and there. Talk about a mood swing...

Jackie slid her hands down her boyfriend's old shirt, the one he was wearing, and touched his stomach. She began to climb, feeling his chest. Hyde responded by grabbing her butt and pulling her closer.

They broke their kiss to stare into each other's eyes. As much as they wanted this, the risk was too high. They couldn't be found out, and worse, found out while doing it.

"We should...uh... go to sleep."

Jackie almost chocked those words out, and pulled herself off from her boyfriend. She checked to make sure all of her clothes were hanging up drying so she had something respectable to wear for tomorrow.

She felt eyes on her.

"What?"

Hyde had been giving her That Look as she walked around his room, still looking cute as ever in his clothes. He didn't know when he'd ever get this gorgeous view again so he was soaking in the sights.

"Well get a nice long look because this is the last time you'll see me like this."

"Whatever makes you happy, babe."

Ah, that smirk again. Jackie wanted to be mad but it melted her. She looked around and figured all of her ducks were in a row.

She walked over to Hyde, now standing by his cot waiting for her.

She gave him a kiss as she wrapped her arms around him.

"Thank you, baby."

Hyde seemed to have successfully passed whatever test this was. His girlfriend wasn't screaming, or crying. She was still willing to sleep there. Except there was still one problem...

"Oh uh, hey it's totally fine that we don't do it tonight and all. I'm not pressuring you or anything but uh... I just wanted you to know that uh...There's not really anything I can do about this uh situation."

Hyde tried to gingerly bring up the uh, issue at hand. He pointed to his crotch hoping Jackie would get the message.

"Steven!" Jackie playfully slapped Hyde on the arm.

"What? It's not my fault you're a little tease and look super cute in my clothes."

Jackie wanted to be super mad. She didn't know the appropriate response. In all honesty she wasn't. Steven's boner didn't make Jackie uncomfortable or angry and she didn't consider him pervy for it. Actually, she was proud of herself that despite looking like absolute trash, she's still got it.

"I'll take it as a compliment. But don't start any funny business!"

"Yes, dear."

Hyde and Jackie made their way on to the cot. Lying down, Hyde held her close while trying to position his waist to not make her uncomfortable.

Jackie pulled Steven closer to her, and he buried his head in her neck. Usually he would burry himself in her luscious, feathered, dry hair. But today, he had a damp, clumpy mess. He didn't seem to mind.

And as much as Jackie swore to NEVER LET THIS HAPPEN AGAIN... it seems she could allow it, just for one night. It would all be fine. She can do her make up and hair in the morning. Her designer clothes will be dry. And she'll be her presentable self again in less than 12 hours.

But as she laid there with her boyfriend still holding on to her, still attracted to her, still caring for her, she felt a sigh of relief. She could let it go.

It's only for one night.


End file.
